Well I am back to the city of excesses and again my spirits have plummeted into an abyss..mainly because its very cold and grey and I hate it when i cant feel the sun on my face.
Well so yes the journey continues. The funny thing is when you have done enough analysis and introspected enough and you are almost close to establishing some unknown fact about yourself bam!!! some thing else comes up right into your face and laughs out loud. You thought you knew yourself enough well let me give you a few more surprises. SO once again you blast whateve notions or facts that you had managed to collect and start drawing a new picture.
Why am I blabbering well coz i m getting into these notion blasting sessions awfully lot these days. Its like i dont know myself anymore but amazingly enough ihave never been so sure of a few things in life as I am now..so yes i dont know who I am but but i know what i want..a big gap though but its ok I have made my peace with myself that I will let it all flow and i will flow with it..
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Monday, December 21, 2009
Far and Wide
I am sitting here at the rooftop....exteremely chilly Banglore wind with drizzling in my hair...I cant stop thinking about the year gone by. 1 year 5 cities and still counting. You can count the number of days left before the sun sets on 2009. Off late i have started feeling that travelling has a healing effect on me. September 2009 when i was trying to gather my life together, pick up pieces and move on i landed in Pune another anazing place i will never forget. I didnt know the place..just got out of the airport and started wandering, did that for 4 days, visiting ashrams, temples, malls nowhere and everywhere with no direction and aimless and then finally something inside me told me it was time to go back home. Before that i did the same in Chennai which had beocme my home for the past 2 years..I had comfortbly settled in and then as fate would have it..it was time to move.
October was a time when I had absolutely nothing to do. Nothingness apart from other things was driving me crazy so again I packed my bags and started this time it was Jaipur. Sometime in life you need to be alone so tha you can get back to the crowd. so many days in Jaipur and so many in Ajmer I was still not satisfied. I wanted to be tired, wanted to feel the bone tiring fatigue which will make you forget everything, I wished to pack my bags and leave for a place i had never been before and didnt want to tell my whereabouts to anyone. I wanted to know how it feels to be invisible or maybe unidentified in a sea of people. Its as if deliberately i wanted to be miserable..I had heard it from someone that the only way to distract yourself from your pain is to hurt yourself somewhere else so that you forget about the first wound and worry about the second. So maybe thats what I want to do. Be unknown in a place far away from home and away from all those who love me so that I lead a life completely devoid of the emotions of love and affection.
I dont know when will this wanderlust stop. 21st December 2009 is Bangalore, 23rd Dec 2009 it will be Chennai and then back to Delhi. Chennai, Bangalore, Pune, Jaipur, Ajmer and I still want to go somewhere else because I cant stop myself from wandering. Somehow my own city doesnt seem like home anymore and I dont know why.. I dont know where this will take me and where it will end.
Sitting at a secluded spot at the Kottivakkam beach I felt more at home than I feel everyday commuting from Delhi to Noida in the superplush Delhi Metro. I dont know if I will feel at home ever again and when
October was a time when I had absolutely nothing to do. Nothingness apart from other things was driving me crazy so again I packed my bags and started this time it was Jaipur. Sometime in life you need to be alone so tha you can get back to the crowd. so many days in Jaipur and so many in Ajmer I was still not satisfied. I wanted to be tired, wanted to feel the bone tiring fatigue which will make you forget everything, I wished to pack my bags and leave for a place i had never been before and didnt want to tell my whereabouts to anyone. I wanted to know how it feels to be invisible or maybe unidentified in a sea of people. Its as if deliberately i wanted to be miserable..I had heard it from someone that the only way to distract yourself from your pain is to hurt yourself somewhere else so that you forget about the first wound and worry about the second. So maybe thats what I want to do. Be unknown in a place far away from home and away from all those who love me so that I lead a life completely devoid of the emotions of love and affection.
I dont know when will this wanderlust stop. 21st December 2009 is Bangalore, 23rd Dec 2009 it will be Chennai and then back to Delhi. Chennai, Bangalore, Pune, Jaipur, Ajmer and I still want to go somewhere else because I cant stop myself from wandering. Somehow my own city doesnt seem like home anymore and I dont know why.. I dont know where this will take me and where it will end.
Sitting at a secluded spot at the Kottivakkam beach I felt more at home than I feel everyday commuting from Delhi to Noida in the superplush Delhi Metro. I dont know if I will feel at home ever again and when
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Because we dont let the dead remain dead...
I feel we are done to death with this issue but still we dont let it die. SO finally after 17 years,, Liberahn report is out and it tells us something that we knew all along. So yes the BJP top brass was involved in it infact they were the once who engineered the whole episode. And yes the Congress governmentr at the center did nothing however to stop what was happening (It is slightly difficult to digest that in a region which had a 500 year old history of unrest thousands of car sevaks gather and no one and absolutely no one has a clue of what they are upto).
Well only yesterday some news channel claimed that the report was actually written by a journo and that Justice Liberhan has never really been to Ayodhya to even inspect the disputed site. Such is the credibility of this report that after crores of the taxpayer's rupees were spent in arriving at this mammoth report it didnt even surprise us
The question which echos in my mind over and over again is that after 17 years when the common man cant care less about this issue the media and the politicians are all over the place singing this song and consider it to be much more important than the issues of inflation, minimum support prices and the unreasonable taxes being levied on the people of Delhi by their beloved Shiela Dikshit.
Did we not know that the entire BJP top brass was involved in the Ram Janmabhoomi issue and were being amply supported by Shivsena and Sangh Parivar. Similarly were we not aware of the involvement of Jagdish Tytler and HKL Bhagat in the 84 Anti- Sikh Riots, we certainly didnt need Nanavati commision's report on that.
More and more such incidents and failure on the part of all such enquiry commissions to bring the guilty behind bars has led me to think that these reports and commissions are never meant to bring factrs to light or to do justice. These are merely to keep these incidents alive in some part of the system so that whenever a particular party feels they dont have a conceret agenda for election they can bring the dead back from the grave and hang the guilty all over again without really hanging them so that they have something to talk about in the upcoming elections.
What was the need to for opening the pandora's box now and spilling the dirt all over the place. Why make the people relive the horrors of that time again. I have seen a lot of my Sikh friends' mothers or grand mothers cringe at the mention of 84. So whenever we talk about 84, or Bhopal gas tragedy or the Babri episode we are forcing a lot of people who were the victims in all these incidents, to go through the same pain and relive the tragedy all over again. The feeling of helplessness that sweeps through them when they look back and see what they have lost and the guilty are still scot free must be overwhelming.
Sadly our political system is so depraved and degraded with no sympathy or compassion for human lives that our politicians do not feel ashamed to make agendas out of such issues.
When congress comes to power it is Babri Masjid, Godhra which are inspected and analysed over and over again so that they remain fresh in Public Memory and when BJP is in power it is Bofors. All they ever want to do is pull each other down, they have no inclination of bringing justice to such cases. Inspite of all the evidences can the Government arrest anyone for Babri demolition. NO, a big no because they know they will be damaging a chunk of their votebank. People like Uma Bharti, Praveen Togadia or even Narendra Modi who were captured on camera, accepting their crimes they committed, even they havnt been touched.
It is a harsh reality that Indian politics is full of blood sucking politicians a majority of who believe in seperatist policies. They are the people who do not want communal peace in the country because then they will not have a any agendas and plus for ages they have been exploiting this divide without which they will all of a sudden become blind and directionless.
Is it the politics of religion or the religion of politics??
Well only yesterday some news channel claimed that the report was actually written by a journo and that Justice Liberhan has never really been to Ayodhya to even inspect the disputed site. Such is the credibility of this report that after crores of the taxpayer's rupees were spent in arriving at this mammoth report it didnt even surprise us
The question which echos in my mind over and over again is that after 17 years when the common man cant care less about this issue the media and the politicians are all over the place singing this song and consider it to be much more important than the issues of inflation, minimum support prices and the unreasonable taxes being levied on the people of Delhi by their beloved Shiela Dikshit.
Did we not know that the entire BJP top brass was involved in the Ram Janmabhoomi issue and were being amply supported by Shivsena and Sangh Parivar. Similarly were we not aware of the involvement of Jagdish Tytler and HKL Bhagat in the 84 Anti- Sikh Riots, we certainly didnt need Nanavati commision's report on that.
More and more such incidents and failure on the part of all such enquiry commissions to bring the guilty behind bars has led me to think that these reports and commissions are never meant to bring factrs to light or to do justice. These are merely to keep these incidents alive in some part of the system so that whenever a particular party feels they dont have a conceret agenda for election they can bring the dead back from the grave and hang the guilty all over again without really hanging them so that they have something to talk about in the upcoming elections.
What was the need to for opening the pandora's box now and spilling the dirt all over the place. Why make the people relive the horrors of that time again. I have seen a lot of my Sikh friends' mothers or grand mothers cringe at the mention of 84. So whenever we talk about 84, or Bhopal gas tragedy or the Babri episode we are forcing a lot of people who were the victims in all these incidents, to go through the same pain and relive the tragedy all over again. The feeling of helplessness that sweeps through them when they look back and see what they have lost and the guilty are still scot free must be overwhelming.
Sadly our political system is so depraved and degraded with no sympathy or compassion for human lives that our politicians do not feel ashamed to make agendas out of such issues.
When congress comes to power it is Babri Masjid, Godhra which are inspected and analysed over and over again so that they remain fresh in Public Memory and when BJP is in power it is Bofors. All they ever want to do is pull each other down, they have no inclination of bringing justice to such cases. Inspite of all the evidences can the Government arrest anyone for Babri demolition. NO, a big no because they know they will be damaging a chunk of their votebank. People like Uma Bharti, Praveen Togadia or even Narendra Modi who were captured on camera, accepting their crimes they committed, even they havnt been touched.
It is a harsh reality that Indian politics is full of blood sucking politicians a majority of who believe in seperatist policies. They are the people who do not want communal peace in the country because then they will not have a any agendas and plus for ages they have been exploiting this divide without which they will all of a sudden become blind and directionless.
Is it the politics of religion or the religion of politics??
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Who's language is it anyway????
As visuals of MLAs hitting a colleague right when he was taking his oath in the assembly flasshed across all major news channels within the country I thought this is their 15 minutes of fame. Those MLAs were suspended for 4 years but who cares they became heroes in the eyes of their leader and for all those who would rather die than hear any other language.
But i wonder what is this new found jingoism which is rising in relatively small pockets of the country. These politicians keep finding newer and better ways to harrass the people of India so that no one really points at the real issues. The issues of poverty, education, corruption healthcare and what not. Which politician worth his salt has a real agenda in todays time. For some it is Ram, for some it is Dalits,some live and die for their language. But has anybody ever bothered to know if the public wants these agendas or not and if their issues are our issues. How does it matter to a common man working on a shop floor and living in slums somewhere in Mumbai whether the sign boards in the city are in Hindi or Marathi, whether the ministers take oath in the language of the land.
Someone should as ask this question to the MNS leader that what will happen if the same treatment is given to all the marathis living outside Maharashtra. I have a lot of Marathi colleagues, and I live in Delhi..should i beat all of them up or not talk to them coz they have jobs which any other delhite could have had. Utter rubbish..Raj Thackrey should kno that he cannot keep boiling the same water over and over again..people evetually will get tired. We live in a country where no 2 neighbours speak the same language..or if its the smae language its a different dialect so who should decide what language should be spoken where. Such are our political leaders that for them issues like floods and drought are of no importance but what is important is the language in which the epitaph is written on the tombstone of all those who die in these calamities. What kind of politics is this?? Imagine if in the Lok sabha where you have representation from the entire country everyone is allowed to speak their mother tongue then what chaos wil it be. Will will have to make a bigger arena for holding sessions coz then we will have an equal mnumber of translators for people who do not understand Marathi, Tamil, telugu or other languages.
Where exactly are we heading? We make fun of our neighbours for the instability and that bhutto cannot mind his house but can we?? wer are letting a bunch of uneducated and sone case educated hooligans decide what language we speak..what clothes we wear..whether a certain community should or should not sing Vande Mataram.
It is funny that we spend crores and crores on for making issues out of non issues..we waste presious assembly time in such petty discussions which to my mind do notg have a bearing on the common man at all....
I as a citizen definately feel cheated that the money being wasted in all this bull shit is commom man's money..
Inflation is sky high..we have people like Madhu Koda who have amassed such a huge amount of wealth that all the governments machinery is unable to unearth..we have flood victims dying due to lack of rescue efforts but there are people like Raj Thakrey who have nothing better to do than fool the poor citizens.
But i wonder what is this new found jingoism which is rising in relatively small pockets of the country. These politicians keep finding newer and better ways to harrass the people of India so that no one really points at the real issues. The issues of poverty, education, corruption healthcare and what not. Which politician worth his salt has a real agenda in todays time. For some it is Ram, for some it is Dalits,some live and die for their language. But has anybody ever bothered to know if the public wants these agendas or not and if their issues are our issues. How does it matter to a common man working on a shop floor and living in slums somewhere in Mumbai whether the sign boards in the city are in Hindi or Marathi, whether the ministers take oath in the language of the land.
Someone should as ask this question to the MNS leader that what will happen if the same treatment is given to all the marathis living outside Maharashtra. I have a lot of Marathi colleagues, and I live in Delhi..should i beat all of them up or not talk to them coz they have jobs which any other delhite could have had. Utter rubbish..Raj Thackrey should kno that he cannot keep boiling the same water over and over again..people evetually will get tired. We live in a country where no 2 neighbours speak the same language..or if its the smae language its a different dialect so who should decide what language should be spoken where. Such are our political leaders that for them issues like floods and drought are of no importance but what is important is the language in which the epitaph is written on the tombstone of all those who die in these calamities. What kind of politics is this?? Imagine if in the Lok sabha where you have representation from the entire country everyone is allowed to speak their mother tongue then what chaos wil it be. Will will have to make a bigger arena for holding sessions coz then we will have an equal mnumber of translators for people who do not understand Marathi, Tamil, telugu or other languages.
Where exactly are we heading? We make fun of our neighbours for the instability and that bhutto cannot mind his house but can we?? wer are letting a bunch of uneducated and sone case educated hooligans decide what language we speak..what clothes we wear..whether a certain community should or should not sing Vande Mataram.
It is funny that we spend crores and crores on for making issues out of non issues..we waste presious assembly time in such petty discussions which to my mind do notg have a bearing on the common man at all....
I as a citizen definately feel cheated that the money being wasted in all this bull shit is commom man's money..
Inflation is sky high..we have people like Madhu Koda who have amassed such a huge amount of wealth that all the governments machinery is unable to unearth..we have flood victims dying due to lack of rescue efforts but there are people like Raj Thakrey who have nothing better to do than fool the poor citizens.
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